bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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