You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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