Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
ugly people sure do ruin things
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
