btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Nobody cheats on THIS.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize