I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
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