I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
