oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize