hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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