I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
