Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
