We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
