Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
