You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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