Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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