love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
