I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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