i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
