this beer tastes like vomit already
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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