Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
