haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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