why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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