Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
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You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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