We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
