i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
