Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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