no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
