would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I think pants incapable of making pants work
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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