Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
