Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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