i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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