Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
