no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
