I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
