also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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