North Korea, Best Korea!
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
My penis needs a shock collar
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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