I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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