day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
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The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
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My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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