:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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