I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
