Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
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