Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.

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(847): View more from Illinois

So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be

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(979): View more from Texas

Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?

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(916): View more from California

He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(845): View more from New York

she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.

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(720): View more from Colorado

If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.

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(309): View more from Illinois

I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later

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