it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
