I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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