i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
