I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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