i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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