I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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