According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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