That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
