let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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